I feel SO fortunate and grateful that my husband and I reached the 28 weeks mark this past Sunday. I'm telling y'all, counting in two week increments makes me feel like I'm in a time machine, just zooming forward!
It feels like so much happens in a two week time span but at the same time, looking forward to the finish line (January 5th) seems like such a journey! I guess that comes with the anxiousness for our little girl to just be here. I try not to say that too often, though. We want her to stay in just as long as she needs to!
This two weeks Avalynn has reached the size of an eggplant. My husband swears that these sizing charts are off. He thinks an eggplant is small but I, oh so lovingly, remind him often that I still have three more months to go. And, that eggplant is going to double or triple in size. Rushing things I tell ya!
It's amazing how much your belly changes throughout pregnancy. Or, at least mine has. I've carried low throughout the entire pregnancy but just recently, I've started "tightening up" in my upper belly and I feel like it's raising! Weird?
We're officially in the third trimester which excites me beyond words! We're so close I can taste it! We learned that this two weeks our little girl is chunkin' up! Ooh, I hope she has roll-y poll-y thighs and puffy cheeks! I heart baby fat. We also learned that she is fully capable of living outside the womb now, since her lungs are fully developed, but we want her to stay and grow as long as possible, of course. One of the neatest things about this two weeks was learning that she can actually taste and react to foods that I eat now. She really reacts to chocolate (just like her mama!) and spicy foods.
While lying in bed the other evening, Avalynn was moving in a way that she hadn't up until now. Dragging limbs across my belly to the point that I could see them poking up and out. I was thrilled when I placed the hubby's hand on my stomach and he experienced that, as well. Seeing his face light up just warms me. It's the little things.
We've scheduled our next 4D ultrasound for November so that we can see her little face one more time before she makes her grand appearance and we're anxiously waiting for that appointment!
I've gotten to the point in this pregnancy where I've allowed my mind to start wandering. Not in the negative, "What if this or that happens?" way but more in the dream-y way. Until this point, I haven't allowed myself to visualize "birth day" because I didn't want expectations. And, to be honest, even though I'd been told time and time again that this pregnancy was very healthy and baby girl was growing right on schedule; I still harbored fear from the little one that we lost before sweet Avalynn came along.
October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month and I figured I'd bring my awareness to it, as well. You'd be so surprised by how many precious women that you pass daily who have lost a child through miscarriage, still birth and infant loss. Through heartache, I felt banded to these women and, although mine and my husband's journey was kept very private, I felt connected through the stories I'd read on the internet or the testimonials I'd heard of those closest to me. And, while it is broad spread and a common heartache, it doesn't make it any easier for those experiencing it. The loss of that child, no matter the time frame or circumstance, never truly leaves the minds of those who experienced that love... and loss.
I don't write this as a pity post. I am blessed beyond measure. I am expecting my baby girl after time and heartache and for that, I am thankful. But there are those who are not so fortunate. There are those who are still waiting. Those who are still coping. Those who still yearn for understanding.
So, this month, when you notice that lady who has "been married for ten years and STILL hasn't had a child?!" or you become annoyed with the "strange" woman in line at the grocery store who smiles and coos at your little one, take a moment to consider their life, their trials. They could be experiencing that longing or coping with a terrible letdown.
January 22nd, 2013. <3
"There is no foot too small that it cannot leave an imprint on this world."